The Time Is Gone……
The time will come when each of us needs to vent. Some of us it takes a little longer than others. Well, today is my day. About 4 months ago my Mother passed away. I got the call at 2am from my sister, who was living with my mother. The day before family and friends gathered to say their good byes. It was hard for me because my mother refused to see me. I sent her gifts, plants, flowers, food baskets and baked her favorite pastries just for her. I had asked her, when she would call to say thank you, if I could come over and spend time with her, just the two of us. But, that never happened. My sister kept her away from certain people, like me and my family. Phone calls were a 3 way conversations on speaker. I could not have a minute with her without my sister.She completely alienated people who loved my mother. Eventually, the phone calls were few. About 6 years ago, my Aunt who I was very close with, called me one morning to tell me that my sister had sold her home and was moving in with my mother. I questioned that. My Aunt made the comment that it wasn’t to take care of her sister but to take care of herself. And, that’s exactly what happened. The service was humiliating. The Pastor empathized the fact that my “poor” sister spent years unselfishly taking care of “her” mother. This man completely ignored myself and my family. Food, dinner, was put out buffet style for all in attendance. When my family went into the dining room there was not a seat OR table for us. My husband had to ask one of the funeral home staff to please put a table up for us. Well, she did. Down at the end of the hall, completely away from everyone else. And most of the food was gone. People did not even know who we were. I was so humiliated by this I spoke to the Pastor’s wife and told her exactly what I thought of her husband. Pastors are not supposed to deliberately hurt people. I guess he missed that part! Anyway, after the service I only saw my sister 3 times. The last was when her son-in-law, a police officer, brought the trust over to my home. No one came in. They all stay in the car. I put the envelope down and walked out to say hello and offer coffee. No one looked at me. My sister was very short and abrupt with me. Then they left. When I went back into my home my husband had the trust The sad look on his face told me everything. As I read it, I began to cry. How could a mother purposely hurt her own child? Or her grandchildren? My mother had left EVERYTHING, EVERYTHING to my sister. Bank account, home, car, jewels…everything. I would never wish this hurt on anyone. It’s hard to realize one day that your mother had no feelings for you. None for her grandsons. This hurt has been with me now for 4 months and it hurts more every day.
I wanted to tell this in hopes it my help. This is only part of the story. There are years of hurt and meaness. Deliberate control from both. Ignoring me for family functions and telling me later. Hurting my children. Hurt? Beyond hurt! Accepting everything I gave and still excluding me from her life.
My mother is gone. There is no way now that I can tell her how devastated I feel. The time is gone………
Until the next time…..may your days be bright with laughter and filled with an abundance of love.Save